Sunday 27 December 2015

Meri Humnafas.....Meri Dost


28th Dec 2015 marks our 14th Marriage Anniversary. Farah & me were married in Patna on this day in 2001.

14 Years is considered a milestone in the Indian cultural tradition. We have heard of 'Chaudah saal ka vanvaas'.....well in my case this has not been anything like a 'vanvaas'. I would prefer to call it 'Chaudah saal ka harsh-o-ullas' !!




I consider myself one lucky man to have an absolutely wonderful human being as my soulmate. She is not just externally beautiful but is an exceptionally wonderful human being from the inside as well. She is able to connect with all kinds of people , young and old, rich and poor. She is an extremely compassionate and loving person.


Just after I got married, one of Farah's closest friends, Shahwar, told me that 'Azfar Bhai, Farah is a gem of a person'. She was spot on.

She sacrificed her career firstly for me, as my job took me to different parts of the world and then for Ammar, as he was growing up. Had she persued her career in Dentistry, I am sure she would have done wonders.


Over the years, her love & support has been a huge contributor to whatever I have been able to do.

At times I have been guilty of taking this exceptionally gifted and wonderful woman for granted. I have sometimes been self-centered and callous too, but she has stood by me through thick and thin. I do realize how blessed I am to have her in my life. 



                            

Dear Farah, on our 14th Anniversary, I just want to let you know that it is difficult to put into words what you mean to me.
It is my desire that the next 14 years should belong to you, when you can realize your full potential....when you can shine the brightest.....Insha Allah....





You mean the world to me ......you are my most prized possession.

Saturday 19 December 2015

New Home

Today 19th Dec 2015,  is a very memorable day for Farah , Ammar & me. We moved into our new home today. We are dead tired now but very happy. I must thank Allah for giving us the opportunity to live in such a lovely house in a very scenic location.

Wednesday 9 December 2015

Ramadhar Singh & Shafique Ahmad

I was in Birla Institute of Technology (BIT), Mesra, Ranchi, during 1994-1997 for my Masters in Computer Applications (MCA) degree. We MCA students used to stay in Hostel Number 5 (Boy's Hostel) along with students of MBA, BMI (Bio-Medical Instrumentation), B.Pharm and MIS (Masters in Information Science).

                            Institute Building, Birla Institute of Technology, Mesra , Ranchi



The BIT, Mesra Campus is spread across a huge area, most of it deeply forested. It is extremely scenic and picturesque. Our hostel was some 2 km from the Institute Main Building.

                                                                  Hostel 5 Building

In the MIS batch of 1994-1996 there were these two guys named Ramadhar Singh and Shafique Ahmad who were in the same hostel as us MCA students.
We would often meet them in the cafeteria (called Mess). 
Over a period of time we got to know them. It seemed that these two were very good friends, though they appeared to be very different personalities. Perhaps they were friends before they joined BIT, Mesra. Ramadhar was tall and upright, a proud Rajput. But he had some problem in one foot due to which he walked with crutches. We saw him on crutches for most of his 2 years in the hostel. Despite the handicap he was an outgoing, friendly and confident guy. If memory serves me right he was able to walk without crutches by the time he completed his course. Shafique kept a very low profile. A very amiable but shy sort of guy.

These two were always together.

After I left BIT Mesra, I never met them or kept in touch with them in the last 18 year. After all they were just acquaintances in the hostel along with so many other boys. But I could never forget them. I will explain why.

Recently I checked regarding them with a few other friends and found their LinkedIn  profiles -


Ramadhar is now VP Technology - Global Wholesale Banking in a top IT company in Hyderabad. 
This is quite expected, in keeping with his extrovert and confident personality.


Shafique's profile says 'Petroleum Data Analyst' with Qatar Petroleum in Qatar.

So happily both seem to be well placed in life.

Now on to why I still remember them, despite just knowing them as acquaintances in the hostel.

As I mentioned earlier Ramadhar had some problem in his foot and he could only walk with crutches. (maybe this was the result of an accident). Our hostel was quite far from the Institute Building where the classes were held. Most of us walked. But there was no way Ramadhar could go that distance on crutches. Everyday Shafique would take him to and fro from the University on his bicycle. It was quite funny to see the tall and lanky Ramadhar riding pillion with his crutches in hand. It was remarkable to see the devotion and care Shafique had for Ramadhar. Sometimes while trying to sit on the bike, Ramadhar would fall down. Shafique would lift him up and help him get back on the bike. Their deep bond of friendship was quite remarkable especially in an environment where everyone wanted to watch their own backs first. It never changed in all the 2 years they were in the hostel.

Now that I think back, it was only incidental that they belonged to two different religions. Their friendship was based on human values. This is in keeping with India's 'Ganga Jamni Tahzeeb (Sanskriti)'....Our great tradition of 'harmony despite diversity'.

There is nothing unique about this story. There are hundreds and thousands of stories like Ramadhar and Shafique's.......I am sure all of you have many. I can recall many as well.
We don't even feel the need to highlight the fact these remarkable friendships and bonds develop despite one being a Hindu and the other, a Muslim. This is so much part of our culture. 
Sometimes we forget how unique this is till a foreigner points it out to us. They marvel at it.

We know that there have been periods of madness and hatred when Hindus and Muslims have killed each other. There have been so many riots.  Many of these were instigated for political reasons.
But largely, when left to their own devices, the common Hindu and the common Muslim in India has chosen to live in harmony.

This is India's great strength and it needs to be further strengthened. Any attempt to force people to follow a particular way of life will destroy this beautiful ethos.

We need an India where more Ramadhars and Shafiques become best friends.


Saturday 28 November 2015

Gangsta Granny

Watched 'Gangsta Granny' today in Orchard Theater, Dartford with Ammar. Very enjoyable. My first experience of real Theater.
Great performance by the lady playing Granny.


Wednesday 25 November 2015

Ammar's One Liners



25th Nov 2015
Ammar returned home from school today complaining of tummy ache .......when asked how it happened - 'Science ke baad jab maths aaya to pet main dard shuru ho gaya'........-:)


18th Nov 2015
Yesterday after I chose a 'black' mobile when there were many other colour choices, Ammar reprimanded me - 'Papa, you will always be a stereotypical person'........-:) ........time for Papa to become a more 'experimental' person !!

17th Oct 2015
Today Farah asked me whether I want to have tea.....to this Ammar replied - 'Papa chai nahin piyenge.....inko chai se iss qadar nafrat hai'. -:) ......effect of the Pakistani serials he is watching....

29th Sep 2015
Today while discussing his day in school, Ammar mentioned about one of his classmates, 'He must be lying'. To this I responded, 'Why would he lie, Ammar. You should not think like that'.
I was subjected to a lecture 'Papa, you have no idea what the real world is like .....you are like a newborn baby.....you should not be scared to face the real world' -:) -:)

19th Feb 2014
Ammar said this today (in all seriousness) -
Louis Pasteur invented a vaccine to inject the Rabbis -:)


ile emoticon

Monday 23 November 2015

Spectre - Bond Movie

Watched the latest Bond movie 'Spectre' yesterday. Pankaj had planned it as a 'boys night out' with Sameer. Danish had come to our place on Saturday. He came for the movie too. Movie was paisa vasool.....a typical Bond action flick.


Friday 20 November 2015

Today




Very good poem by Rabab Haque (she is the wife of my cousin Athar Haque) -

http://rababhaque.blogspot.co.uk/2015/11/dedicated-to-refugees-of-all-kinds.html?spref=fb

Dedicated to refugees (of all kinds, everywhere)


Na samandar bakaram apna
Na koi sahil muntazir
Hum shikasta kashti ke musafir
Be-saro-saman nikle

Na koi hamdard apna
Na rahbar koi
Hum pattharon ke shaher se
Hoke pareshan nikle

Na taaron ne ki rehnumayi
Na chand ne thandak di hai
Hum namkeen paani se dhotte
Apne zakhmo-jaan nikle

Na sar pe topi apne
Na jhande haathon me
Hum dhoondhne khuda ko
Chaak-e-garebaan nikle


Monday 16 November 2015

Azam Khan

Watched the Samajwadi Party leader Azam Khan's interview with Barkha Dutt today on NDTV -

http://www.ndtv.com/video/player/the-buck-stops-here/paris-condemnable-but-why-no-tears-for-us-bomb-victims-azam-khan/391079?hp

He did bring out a different perspective on the Paris Attack, but I found his style of conversation absolutely hilarious.
He speaks 'khalis urdu' and uses such emotional and evocative language. He does this with no change in his expression. He should have been a script writer in Bollywood. His style of speaking resembles Dilip Kumar a lot. Without doubt he is a character.

His views sometimes may sound over the top and sensational but he is able to provide reasoning for that.

I was surprised that Barkha was able to keep a straight face during the interview today.

Saturday 14 November 2015

Nitish Kumar


Nitish Kumar is going to be sworn in for his third term as Chief Minister of Bihar. He along with Laloo has dealt a huge blow to the Modi-Amit Shah juggernaut in Bihar elections.

With this victory his stature has increased immeasurably in national politics.



He is a consummate politician having been in politics for the last 40 years. At the same time he is so unlike the typical political leader. He is soft spoken, almost self effacing who lets his work speak for itself. He is like a breath of fresh air in today's political environment in India. He has resigned many times previously on matters of principle. In fact his last resignation in 2014 after the debacle in Lok Sabha elections from the Chief Ministership of Bihar almost became his undoing. He made a virtually unknown Jitan Ram Manjhi as the CM who turned against him and later joined the BJP.

He has a clean image. No allegations of corruption taint him. He has also stayed away from dynastic politics and nepotism, a rarity in India. He is an engineer by profession. He is extremely articulate and puts his point forward in a very clear and logical manner. He does this in a manner which is non-confrontational and actually endears him to others. There is certain civility about him which is so lacking among other politicians. He has credibility as well.



In this election, owning to Nitish's clean and positive image, BJP found it very difficult to target him.

In the last 10 years he has done some really good work in Bihar. Electricity has now reached the remotest village of Bihar. Even his worst critics have to admit that he has put Bihar on the road to progress.

In today's political landscape in India, he appears to have all qualities to lead the country. Hopefully in the 2019 Lok Sabha election, he is projected as the Prime Ministerial candidate.


Massacre in Paris

Yesterday some 130 people were killed in Paris in coordinated terror attacked. There were terror attacks in Beirut and Syria as well. The responsibility of these attacks have been claimed by ISIS.

These attacks have to be condemned in the strongest terms. They claim to do this in the name of Islam. It is unfortunate that these people just don't understand Islam. They are totally misinterpreting Islam. Their actions are creating a big problem for the rest of Muslims in the world.

I pray for the people killed and maimed in these attacks. I pray to Allah to show the right path to these misguided people who don't think twice before taking the lives of innocent people. They have to be dealt with severely.

But this problem cannot be solved just by bombing ISIS. That would be just addressing the symptoms. The root cause of this issue has to be identified and addressed.

Thursday 12 November 2015

Maquti


Maquti (some people call it Makuti which is not the correct pronunciation) is one of my favourite sweet dishes. The authentic version is normally prepared during Muslim marriages in Bihar especially Patna. It is served in small earthen bowls (called Dhakni). After it is cooked it is poured in these Dhakni's and left to get thicker once it gets colder. In marriage dinners (Shadi ka Khana) hundreds of these dhakni's are arranged in rows on tables for people to have them as dessert.




Its taste is truly sublime. I have had desserts and sweet dishes around the world but nothing compares with it. It is a mystery to me why it has not become popular in the rest of India or even in other parts of the world. Perhaps because it has not been marketed properly. Or maybe it is difficult to cook.

In India whenever Maquti would be prepared on occasion of marriage or any other function, I would store away these dhaknis and would have it for many days. I am salivating now writing this -:)
I don't think many people outside Bihar have even heard of Maquti. They are missing something !


Here is a recipe I found on the internet, but I don't think it is the authentic one, as it talks about 'grated jaggery'. I think the real one has sugar. Also orange rind.

********************************************************************
Total Time: 15 mins

Serves: 4 to 5 people

Ingredients:

100 gms yellow mung dal soaked in water for 2 hours Or overnight
50 gms rice soaked in water for 2 hours Or overnight
250 mltr milk
100 gms grated jaggery
7 to 8 almonds
7 to 8 cashewnuts
7 to 8 raisins
3 to 4 green cardamom powder Or whole cardamom
1 t/s saffron (kesar)
2 cups water
50 gms mava/khoya (dried whole milk)
Method:

Soak rice and mung dal for about 2 hours Or overnight in 1 cup water for each. I don’t have pic for this one.

Firstly boil soaked mung dal and rice along with water in a heavy bottomed pan. Cook for more 5 to 6 mins.

Once it starts boiling add all dryfruits. Cook on low heat for another 2 mins.

Add grated jaggery and keep stirring continuously for another 2 mins

It’s time to add mava/khoya and milk into the mixture. Let it boil for another 5 mins

By now the mixture will thicken. Infuse saffron with little hot milk. Add saffron infused milk and crushed green cardamom into it.

Let this boil for another 4 mins. Now switch off the gas. Serve this hot Or chilled. I just could not resist hence had it hot hot



Tip

You could skip dry fruits if you wish to.
Vegans can make this in coconut milk.
If jaggery isn’t available you could use sugar.
In replacement of mava/khoya you could use condensed milk. But be careful while adding sugar than as condensed milk is sweet already





Sunday 8 November 2015

Bihar Elections - Huge win for Nitish-Laloo

Woke up today morning to the news of an absolutely stupendous win for Nitish & Laloo in Bihar. It has been a huge loss for NDA.........



Hope this result will force BJP to introspect and move away from its divisive politics.

Saturday 7 November 2015

A Sad Day

This was written in the early hours of 30th July 2015.......


The 1993 Mumbai Blasts convict Yakub Memon will be hanged in the next 2 hours.

The way this case has been handled in the last 22 years culminating in him being given the death penalty, raises very serious questions on the Indian Judicial system.

There is a widespread perception that he has been sent to the gallows to satisfy 'collective public conscience' and to atone for the fact that the real mastermind of this case, his brother Tiger Memon has never been captured by Indian authorities.

There is also a widespread perception that the Indian state is in such a hurry to hang him because he is a Muslim. Many other death row convicts have been supported by the state governments and the law has been manipulated to help them turn it into life sentences.

The fact that Yakub Memon decided to return to India with his wife and newborn daughter along with 7 members of his family, placing his faith in the Indian judicial system, has actually been used against him.

The evidence Yakub brought with him to implicate Pakistan's role in the blasts have been used against him and he is being sent to the gallows. The case against him has been based entirely on the confessions of an accused who turned approver. He later retracted. It is on very loose evidence and even then there was no justification for a death sentence.

It is a travesty of justice.

The judiciary and the state know that Muslims are soft targets. They can do whatever they want with them and get away with it. In fact killing and massacring Muslims is the quickest route to the top. It is a win-win situation.

Death for Yakub Memon has dealt a huge blow to whatever trust Indian Muslims had in the judicial system. I am afraid more and more Muslim youth will start believing that there is very little justice for them in India. This is both sad and dangerous.

Today is a very very sad day.






Saturday 31 October 2015

Imran Khan gets divorced - Again !!

The news of Imran Khan's divorce from his second wife Reham Khan came as a shock yesterday. They had got married in Jan this year and it has now ended abruptly within 10 months.


There are lot of stories circulating regarding the reasons for the divorce. One of the main one is, Reham's political ambitions which Imran disapproved of. But I think that cannot be the main reason, it must be something deeply personal. Anyway it is all over and Imran is back to his bachelor status.

It is unfair to judge people you don't really know, but it appeared that Reham was quite publicity hungry and full of herself. But then Imran must have known this before marrying her. In her talk shows she appeared to be boastful and a bit annoying. But there must have been issues Reham had with Imran as well.

Anyway a rather sad end. I predict Imran will get married again in the next couple of years and to a lady chosen her sisters !!

Ammar & me watched 'The Bridge on the River Kwai' yesterday, the epic David Lean movie.


Sunday 25 October 2015

Movies

Ammar has his half terms (1 week off from school).
We watched 2 movies today .....

The King's Speech
Jodha Akbar

Ammar loved 'Jodha Akbar' and also found 'The King's Speech' rather interesting. Colin Firth's acting in this movie is fabulous.



Thursday 22 October 2015

Sehwag : Part Sublime, Part Ridiculous, Simply Unforgettable





Virender Sehwag has bid adieu to International cricket a few days back. Like the man himself, the announcement came abruptly. No press conference, no farewell match, no fuss. The media (including social media) is full of articles on him. There is a glut of Sehwag nostalgia all around. It feels as if cricket fans are realizing that maybe they were guilty of never fully grasping the worth of his achievements while he was around. Perhaps he was not taken as seriously as he should have been. Partly it was due to the fact that Sehwag never took himself very seriously. He batted with an air of nonchalance. He didn’t show too much emotion whether he scored a triple hundred or a first ball duck, whether he got the captaincy or not. Also, he had to share the limelight with the other batting giants of his time, Sachin & Dravid and to a lesser extent with Ganguly and Laxman.

In the last 2 years of his Test career, when he lost form and was frequently seen throwing his wicket away when the team was in the middle of its worst run of losses, the Indian Cricket fan became somewhat disillusioned with him.  It appeared as if he doesn’t really care. But we forgot that he was always like that. It is just that those shots which used to thrill us, were not coming off anymore. In IPL also it was mostly hit and miss except for one vintage hundred. That was our last memory of Sehwag till his announcement that he is hanging his boots. All of a sudden it dawned on us that we will never again witness another Sehwag special.



Now that it is all over, we can do a dispassionate analysis of his place in Indian Cricket and Cricket in general.

Let me start by saying that when the history of Cricket is written (say) fifty years from now, Sehwag ‘s name will figure in it. Mind you, many batsmen who have scored far more runs than him, have more centuries than him, have better averages than him, maynot be there. But Sehwag will be there. This is for the simple reason that he completely redefined the role of a Test opener. The wisdom distilled over more than 100 years of Test cricket said that the requirements for a good Test opener are –

       Solid Technique
 Ability to build an innings
 Ability to leave balls outside off stump
 Be watchful in the beginning of the innings.
 Ability to patiently gauge the bounce and movement before playing shots
 Ability to blunt the bowling attack, Bat till the shine is gone even if few runs are scored
 Cut out the risky shots as the more shots you play the less chance of staying at the wicket longer



These were the time tested requisites for a good Test opener. For more than 100 years any opener not conforming to these met with little success. The epitome of these principles of batsmanship were Sunil Gavaskar and Geoffery Boycott.

Sehwag’s style and approach made a mockery of these principles. But amazingly he frequently racked up 150 plus scores, many double hundreds and became the first and only Indian triple centurion.  He actually has 2 triple hundreds in Tests. He has 4 scores of 250 plus in Tests. The only other man to do this is Sir Don (Bradman). He played shots from the first ball and was in the fourth gear from the start. And his pace never slowed whether he was in the 90’s, 190’s or 290’s. In fact most often he brought up his hundred, double hundred or triple hundred with a premeditated six.
This was all the more remarkable because when he was a teenager learning to bat, the ‘Gavaskar School of Batsmanship’ was firmly established in India. There were an array of players who took inspiration from Gavaskar (and rightly so), but he was not influenced at all and never felt the need to change his approach.

Hence like Adam Gilchrist, who redefined the role of a wicketkeeper batsman, his place is cricket history is secure.


It is quite an achievement for someone who never saw himself as a Test player at the start of his career. He would have been happy just to cement his place in the ODI team. In fact when I saw him in his first few ODI innings, I thought he didn’t have the temperament and technique for an ODI opener. He had a slam bang style and played too many shots. One has to give credit to Sourav Ganguly that he had the vision to see him as a Test player. It was a stroke of genius. Sehwag sealed it with a hundred on debut, that too in tough batting conditions in South Africa. For this Sehwag is eternally grateful to Ganguly. It won’t be wrong to say that, had there been no Ganguly, there would have been no Sehwag, the Test player.

His complete disregard for records and statistics was also a breath of fresh air. Personal milestones were such high priority for most Indian players that they would slow down in the 90’s, even in slog overs in ODI’s. This would cost India the match many times. This practice had become so firmly entrenched that the cricket fans actually pardoned the players for this selfish approach. Sehwag changed all that. The most famous example of this was his dismissal for 195 on Day 1 of the Sydney Test in 2004 while trying to hit a six. Boycott and Shastri were in the commentary box. Sir Geoffery was aghast, ‘He just threw away the chance of getting into the record books. Just imagine getting a double hundred on the first day of a Sydney Test. I just don’t get this’. Shastri replied, ‘He is Sehwag, not you, Sir Geoffery!! That’s how he plays and that’s how he got to 195 in the first place!’.
It was this bravado and gay abandon which thrilled the whole country and sometimes also led to complete despair.


Sehwag in full flow was a sublime experience. He reminded one of Viv Richards. This is high praise indeed. It is somewhat like the great Don (Bradman) telling Sachin that his batting reminded him of himself.

But on the flip side when it didn’t come off, Sehwag could look absolutely ridiculous as well. I remember in the disastrous England tour of 2011, when the team really needed him to contribute he got a King Pair in one of the Tests, playing outrageous shots. In the last couple of years of his Test career, the ‘sublime’ became less and less and the ‘ridiculous’ was on display more often.
Also sad was the fact that he didn’t give top priority to fitness. At just 33 or 34 years of age when most modern batsmen are at their peak, his reflexes were becoming visibly slower. His batting technique with which he created magic was based on his hand and eye coordination. He hardly bothered to move his feet too much. Once his reflexes slowed down, this directly impacted his shot making. Still he didn’t change anything in his technique or approach to adjust to this.  The big scores were becoming few and far between.  A streaky 20 or 30 became the norm. He just could not reverse the slide.


His batting was based on pure simplicity , ‘See it, hit it’. He was never one to overanalyze his technique or adapt to different situations like say a Dravid or a Tendulkar would do. As long as the eye and the body supported him, he continued to reel off those big hundreds at unbelievable pace. But once the reflexes slowed, it became clear that he was on a downward spiral. Hence the decision to retire at 37 is all the more wise. Clearly there was no way back to those heady days. Prolonging it would have been painful for him as well as for his legion of fans. 

One frequently wondered what he would have done if only he thought more about his batting, made some changes to his approach later in his career, cared more for the records. But then, he would not have been the Sehwag we know, he would never have played those audacious shots. He would not have been the joy to behold. The key to enjoying Sehwag was to accept the sublime with the ridiculous. I must admit while he was playing I struggled to do this. And I am sure many other cricket fans too did the same. Hence the outpouring of nostalgia now that he has called it a day.

On his day, he treated Dale Steyn, Murali, Shoaib Akhtar, James Anderson, Warne and most top bowlers of his era with utter disdain. And there were many many such days that we have enjoyed thoroughly. For the sheer pleasure he has given cricket fans the world over, he is a hard act to follow. It is difficult to imagine a greater match winner for India in Tests in the last 15 years.

One can say this with complete certainty, there will never be another ‘Nawab of Najafgarh’.

Sunday 18 October 2015

Rugby Festival

Ammar had Rugby Festival in his school yesterday.....and his house GWYN won it......








Monday 12 October 2015

Our Dream for Ammar


He is full of hope and happiness.
An optimist at heart.
A positive person.
Full of self confidence and poise.
A good sense of humour.
A sensitive and compassionate person.

A good human being and a good Muslim. Someone with a very strong Imaan.
He is physically fit and in very good health.

He has 4-5 very close and trusted friends. He is a very good friend himself.

He thinks and aims big. He follows his dream and passion.

He is very close to Farah & myself.
He consider me his mentor and friend. Someone he can trust and turn to advise anytime.

Though modern in thought, he is rooted on our Muslim and Indian culture.

He is a fighter and never gives up till he achieves what he is aiming for.

He is a valuable member of the society and is widely respected for his achievements and humane qualities.

A great combination of modern & traditional.

People feel attracted to him due to his high degree of akhlaq and interesting personality.

He is a man of integrity.


Insha Allah !!

Shayari








Monday 5 October 2015

Thursday 1 October 2015

Not My Idea of India



http://www.ndtv.com/opinion/not-my-idea-of-india-1225025?pfrom=home-opinion

Not My Idea of India - By Rana Ayyub (NDTV)


Last month, I was reading Nathuram Godse's statement to the court in his defence of murdering Mahatma Gandhi. The statement published in the form of a book titled 'Why I killed Gandhi' had me in a state of shock with Godse's justification of his intolerance. I was convinced that men like him were a minority, that Godse was a lunatic and the thought that killed Gandhi would not be tolerated by a civilized India.

In one of the paragraphs, Godse goes on to say, "I firmly believed that the teachings of absolute 'ahimsa' as advocated by Gandhiji would ultimately result in the emasculation of the Hindu community, and thus make the community incapable of resisting the aggression or inroads of other communities, especially the Muslims. To counteract this evil, I resolved to enter public life and form a group of persons who held similar views". This was the thought that killed Gandhi and deepened the roots of religious polarization and communalism in Indiasix decades ago.

On 28th September, the brutal murder of 50-year-old Mohammad Ikhlaq in Dadri, in Greater Noida, by a lynch mob of 200 people on the suspicion that he consumed beef has proved once again that the thought that killed Gandhi is gaining momentum.

Ikhlaq, who worked as a carpenter barely 50 kms from Delhi, lived with his ageing mother, wife, younger son and daughter. His elder son, Sartaj, an Indian Air Force personnel is posted in Chennai. The idea of India that Ikhlaq's son Sartaj was trying to protect as an engineer in the Air Force betrayed him and his family earlier this week.

By killing his father, and leaving his brother in a critical condition, Sartaj's nationalism was rewarded in the most ghastly, unthinkable manner. The modus operandi used in the murder was no different than those used by radicals in the past. An announcement was made on a loudspeaker that a cow had been slaughtered and its carcass had been found near a transformer. The rumor later spread in the village with WhatsApp and other messaging tools, something that reminds us of the method used by extremists and bigots triggering the Muzaffarnagar riots in 2014. Within minutes of the announcement, the mob had killed Ikhlaque and severely injured his family. As if this act was not savage enough, government officials sent the meat found in the house to ascertain whether it was indeed beef - the suggestion being that if it indeed was beef, then the murder of two sons of India was justified.

Yes, this is the new India we are referring to where we talk of a revolution in technology, where our Prime Minister visits the Facebook headquarters and we get encouraging photo-ops from Silicon Valley.

This is the new India where the Prime Minister a day after the murder congratulates his Minister for Culture, Dr Mahesh Sharma, on his birthday on Twitter, the same minister who just this month famously pledged to cleanse Indian culture of Western influence. While the PM has every right to congratulate his ministers on their birthdays (birthday celebrations being a Western concept according to the Sangh Parivar), it was shocking that he had no word of condolence for the family of Sartaj, a patriot serving the country. He had no word of condemnation for those savages and murderers who had brought cultural cleansing into action.

This incident comes days after revelations that the Sanatan Sanstha, another outfit with members responsible for the murders of rationalists, had intended to kill senior journalist Nikhil Wagle. In the last two years, three rationalists have been killed, the last being less than a month ago.

There is something very numbing about this. As I write this, I have messages from my friends who tell me they are feeling helpless, friends who believed that this country is headed towards extreme intolerance and they see no future for liberal, peace-loving Indians.

If this message had arrived a week ago, I would have ended up convincing my friends to have faith in the idea of India, but since Tuesday evening, I am unable to identify with my country. Is this the same country which I refused to leave for higher education, for better job prospects, for fellowships by suggesting that I would get homesick within a week of having stayed away? Is this the same country I defended when my NRI friends would mock its backwardness and ask me to move out for my own sanity?

My father saw my tweets on the Sanatan Sanstha a week ago and asked me to stay silent. He is becoming increasingly anxious about the outcome of my views which most often are critical of the establishment unable to contain the increasing bigotry. My friends are asking me to delete certain Facebook posts and tweets which they think might get me in trouble. A friend suggested that the next time I felt like speaking truth, I should speak to her about it than making my views public. 'You never know Rana, anything is possible now' she suggested in a telecon last week.

Something very strange and disturbing is taking place in the country .

There is an increasing intolerance towards what a section of this country believes is against its ideology. There is a lynch mob waiting to label us and shred us to pieces should we wish to disagree with the norms set by them. Let us understand that the beef-eating rumor is not the reason why we should be worried, or even a beef ban in some states which takes away a fundamental right from us. At the crux is the reemergence of the thought that divided this country that killed the Mahatma more than 50 years ago.

The kind of thought we would mock our neighbouring country for on most occasions. As I write this, I am nauseous, pained, ashamed of being a part of this alleged India growth story. This is not the idea I grew up with and the new idea of India has shaken me to the core today.

India, my country, my motherland, why am I unable to recognize you anymore?